I tweeted Billy Grahm when I heard Dave Wades damn mountain rooster crow for a second time. Life occasionally makes me feel like I might be stripped down and crucified by a bunch of Roman centurions.

Did you know Ozzy’s Walk on Water is copyright illegal in the USA. Free speech and press, huh! I can’t walk on water. I have tried. 55:05 5k Yards Pool Freestyle. Try speed walking that type of distance. Heck. Then I got sedated and sublimated for 26 years.

Anyway, I have no one to deny if I hear that damn rooster again. I’m just going to be a mountain hermit and call via my computer transponder plasma touch handheld device in search of wayward chicks.

There is always a rabble of disbelievers. I just want to talk about the Pilate woodpecker in the now dead wetland habitat of the American Ash tree lumber stand where the Chinese invasive Emerald Ash Borer extirpated MLB’s species throughout North America; where the entomological extirpation of the American Ash either destroyed all the Louisville Slugger or forced a switch to Maple.

Yet, I admit my repute of having had an exemplary slugging percentage is simply not true. I wish it were, on one hand, and yet 25 years of celibacy during my sublimation beneath Yale psychiatry makes me wonder if I will ever reach home plate.