The moment of the chemical fragmentation was in a sense my last. The perpetrator was empathetically high on the substance when he ran up to me at the barbeque. I had been innocent in my faith at the time sufficiently to value and aspire to his enlisted service in our United States Navy.
The following day I found myself wandering around obeying orders to find my pillow and board the swim team bus.
After a day or so I was walking between the amphitheatre and the library headed east almost a crowd behind a man in a dark trench coat when a man with a shaven head on the southern face of the building northeast of the northern library entrance pointed past the taller man at me.
I had been debating with myself regarding if the efficacies of the poison had dissipated when this occurred. I was sold a copy of what I later understood to be a commentary on the Bhagavad Gita, and, directed or not I cannot recall; I later found myself in the library reading a copy of Shogun D. T. Suzuki’s book.
I say “what I thought to be” as reference to my second university having a demonstratively differently translated version of the same text. The first translation focused, as I recall, on posture and so fourth in walking, standing and sitting and eventually taught proper seppuku. The second translation of the shoguns book was far more about fung sheui furniture and flower arrangement. The two different universities had separate translations of the Shogunate writings.
Japanese theology is both Zen and Shinto. Zen is an extremist monotheistic Buddhism generative of both samurai seppuku and the Kamikaze. Shinto is an animistic religion which purports life in all things… similar to the way force flows through all things and a true Jedi makes use of it.
Yet, I was, in those days, trapped, or traveling, in a schism within the overall flux. In fact, over the temporality continuum of my sublimation I have, with the help of Yale Psychiatry, been captured within and released from the schism induction which occurred at the moment of fragmentation that was induced by the Navy GI Packie. At least; I will attest that I have never returned from that fragmentation.
Additional stories exist regarding the three decades since I left high school. It is debatable regarding if my 55:05 5k pool freestyle swim was influenced positively or negatively by the toxin or by near veganism resultant of de facto poverty at university… and yet subsequent to my Yale diagnostic induction to psychiatry I doubled my body weight in a world of sedation and sublimation and am only now regaining a healthy BMI. Relative to metabolism; I somehow maintained perhaps 7000 calories per day activity on a vegan vegetarian subsistence died and maintained a displacement tank tested 7bmi at university. Decades later I was at a Connecticut Cardiology annual meeting and the keynote speaker spoke of comparable caloric values of grains, vegetables, proteins in dairy and meats, and various forms of lipids.
Otherwise I read extensively for perhaps 25 years prior to a transition into computing which is shown to my readers by this PEYTORILL website.
Today I am a broken yet saved man. I cannot here tell the complete histories, sciences and perspectives I have garnered. I suppose I know the northern hemisphere. I see a flux of religion and beliefs, sciences. popular paradigms, infrastructures, vehicles, vessels, craft and processes built upon industries and logistical functions of societies making use of extracted and harvested resources and then producing and remediating the correlated waste as though they are all individually and collectively within a scatter plot map of latitudinal, longitudinal, altitudinal, rhumb and thermodynamic lattice of a geospatial quantification structure I somehow see surrounding and beyond myself in memories and deductions, via aspects of my broken cortex.
I am now ever at my navigational set, in a dead reckoned armillary henge perception, eyes transcendent of the perimeter, I, I, a Dreamt Soldier.